Hovering over our lives – creating distance instead of connection

I am on a plane flying from Frankfurt to New York. And I am thinking about what I read the other day about hovering above our lives. In “Love Warrior” Glennon Doyle Melton writes about how she created distance from her emotions and became a writer and that way could observe life without really taking part in life. I wonder what that means for our relationships.

Do we create distance on purpose?

I wondered if this is true for me as well. And I wonder if it is true for our generation. Sometimes it seems like a lot of us take every chance to pull out our electronic devices in search for some connection, whereas it might just happen with the person next to us.

I don’t know about you, but for me it is not so easy to get to that honest place where we really meet each other. To that place where we truly see and are seen. Where we can feel that deep sense of connection.

How did we come here?

I wonder if it is a choice we make. A choice not to connect. A choice to hide. Is it our own choice? Our is it something we learned from others?

And I wonder what stands in the way of that deep connection. Why do we shut down so easily, when there is all the opportunity for connection? Have we unlearned how to be with other people? Have we unlearned to get to know each other? Why do we not reach out more often? Why are we so afraid of each other?

On the way to connection

I guess what is missing is curiosity, trust and an open mind. Being curious who the other person is. Trusting that we have the capacity for connection. And an open mind to look how we can play the game together. A meaningful life is not all about being the most productive and striving for the most bucks. On the contrary, I guess we need more idle time, where we foolishly play and open our minds to all the world has to offer. And I guess it is also going to take a lot of courage. Do you remember that feeling: When you are curious and you have a question burning inside you, but you feel overwhelmed by fear. Will I embarrass myself? Will I be rejected? Don’t let us discuss that fear away, let’s embrace it! That is the way to reconnect with life. To not hover, but to be grounded.

What is the number one struggle you have, when you feel that desire to connect? Let me know in comments. I am excited to explore how we can help each other in that process.

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